Woman Doesn’t Want to Invite Her Future Sister-in-Law to Her Wedding for This Reason

A woman is questioning whether she would be wrong to not invite her soon-to-be sister-in-law to her wedding.

In a post shared on Reddit’s “Am I the A——?” forum, the 25-year-old woman opened up about the difficult wedding planning process she’s had — and how her fiancé’s sister became involved.

According to the woman, she and her fiancé got engaged in June and immediately started wedding planning. The couple had a very specific destination in mind.

“We knew we wanted it in Cyprus as my fiancé’s dad passed away there very suddenly while he was on holiday last year, so it is a way for my fiancé to feel closer to him on the day,” the OP (original poster) explained.

The issue arose when the groom’s sister, 28, said she also wanted to have her wedding in the country for the same reason, and insisted there is one venue she loves that the couple is “not allowed to book.”

“I feel like I should point out she is not engaged, she has been with her boyfriend for around 5 years and he has no plans to propose soon, as far as I am aware,” the Redditor wrote.

The couple eventually found three venue options, one of which was the venue that the groom’s sister told them not to book.

“One we found out was not an option due to the minimum number of guests, as we are only having around 20 people at the wedding. One was not available on any of the dates we wanted, and we did try and work around some different dates, but through more research I did find some red flags about the venue so we decided not to book,” the OP noted. “And the final venue we liked was the one my future SIL said we couldn’t book.”

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According to the OP, she and her fiancé decided to book that venue “after a lot of thinking,” as it was “the most logical option for us and fit the vibe we wanted our wedding to be the best,” considering the size of their wedding and budget.

“And we decided that if my future SIL does get married there, it doesn’t matter to us as we know we will have different weddings,” she added.

The OP then explained that her future sister-in-law was immediately upset after learning about the venue, telling the couple that she “wasn’t coming” and that she “couldn’t believe we would pick a venue over her.”

“We tried to explain that we wanted to take her wishes into account but the other venues didn’t work out so this was our only option. But she insisted that we have ruined her future wedding,” the OP explained.

The OP said she is getting ready to send her “save the dates” — and is “torn” as to whether she should send one to her sister-in-law.

“She has not spoken to us since the argument, she did not come to our engagement celebration and either blanked us at family events or just left when we arrived,” she shared, noting her worry that the groom’s sister could “find some way to ruin the day and try to make it all about her” if they invite her. On the flip side, she said not inviting her could cause a rift in the family.

The Reddit community had mixed takes on the situation, as some commenters wondered why the couple still wouldn’t try to pick another venue or simply invite the sister-in-law despite her complaints.

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“It’s your wedding,” one person responded. “You using the venue doesn’t prevent her from using it. Your wedding is not about her. She doesn’t get a vote. It sounds like she has a bad case of the ‘it’s all about me.’ However, be aware that not inviting her will probably permanently alienate your sibling and future SIL, so do take that into account.”

“Everyone sucks here,” another person chimed in. “She shouldn’t reserve a venue for her future wedding and then get that level of angry when you booked it. But also, come on. There’s nowhere else to get married? You guys are really going to have petty family drama over a wedding venue?”

“I think you would be the a—— if you didn’t give her a save-the-date. Let it be her decision if she wants to go or not,” the Redditor added.