The star opens up to PEOPLE in this week's cover story ahead of the release of her new memoir, 'Getting Naked'
NEED TO KNOW
- Valerie Bertinelli reveals in her new memoir Getting Naked that she was sexually abused at age 11, telling PEOPLE in this week’s cover story, “It doesn’t feel like it owns me anymore.”
- The star, 65, says that the process of opening up about it has taken her “at least” a decade as she was forced to confront shame and self-criticism that was rooted in her childhood trauma.
- Calling herself “a survivor,” Bertinelli credits her son Wolfgang Van Halen, cooking and her work on The Drew Barrymore Show with helping her move forward and focus on the positive.
“I had no plans to reveal this,” says Valerie Bertinelli. “This was going to be a book about teaching people how to love themselves. I did not know that I would go this far.”
For the first time, the star, 65, is revealing that she was sexually abused at 11 years old.
“I guess because I'm healing from it, it’s not so scary anymore,” Bertinelli tells PEOPLE in this week's cover story. “I can say it out loud. I was sexually assaulted. It doesn't feel like it owns me anymore.”
It's part of the "raw truth" that Bertinellii shares in her new book, Getting Naked, out on March 10 from Harper Wave. “It’s about getting getting naked with who I am, emotionally, physically,” she says. “It was really about getting to the nitty gritty and getting to the parts that I thought were shameful and come to find out they’re not. They're all kinds of different facets of what makes us who we are.”
Credit: Andrew Eccles
To open that chapter of the book, Bertinelli “purposely” included a picture of herself at 11 years old "because that was the little girl that was sexually abused,” she says. “And it boggles my mind that this little girl was taken advantage of that way. It boggles my mind because it’s still happening … and I’m furious about it. And we need to start speaking up and saying, ‘Enough.’”
"It's taken me 10 years at least," she explains of her decision to come forward. "The very first time I said it out loud to my therapist, I thought I’m going to feel better now. It got worse before it got better. I maybe ate a little bit more, drank a little bit more. When you stop eating things for comfort, stop drinking alcohol, it exposes your feelings. You can deal with them or not. And I chose to deal with them. I don't feel shame about it anymore. I’m pissed off that it happened. Nobody deserves that.”
And then came 2024, a rough year for Bertinelli. “I had a huge anxiety attack at the end of 2024 that brought me to my knees,” she says. ”And I thought I’m not getting anywhere. I needed to do more work.” That meant digging into what was behind the body shame and the self criticism that she'd long held over the years.
Credit: Courtesy Valerie Bertinelli
“All of that shame had nothing to do with my body,” she says. “It was just something to take out my shame on. My poor body. I was so mean to it. I just needed to get all those voices out of my head. As I was going through that, I’m thinking people are going to wonder, why do I have so much self loathing? That’s not normal. It’s because trauma happened in my childhood for the most part. I can’t speak for anybody else but it’s pretty textbook.”
Asked what she was like at 11 years old, she says, “I loved to color, read, play with my Barbies and ride my bike around the block. I loved my cats. I was just a little girl.”
Looking back, she simply says, "I'm a survivor."
Through all the turmoil, Bertinelli still leads with her heart. It's all part of the emotional connection she shares with fans who've followed her for decades, from the time she was 15 years old on One Day at a Time, to Hot in Cleveland (with her good friend Betty White) and now as part of the "Drew Crew" on The Drew Barrymore Show.
She credits her work on the show with Drew Barrymore, which she calls "an oasis," and the love and support of her son, Wolfgang Van Halen, and her love of cooking with helping her heal. And she's focusing on the positive, along with her new digital platform, Valerie's Place. "I want to build a community where everybody is welcome. It's a place where people can come in to my kitchen and cook with me because I've missed that a lot."
If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual abuse, text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to be connected to a certified crisis counselor.
If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, please contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or go to rainn.org.
Take PEOPLE with you! Subscribe to PEOPLE magazine to get the latest details on celebrity news, exclusive royal updates, how-it-happened true crime stories and more — right to your mailbox.
Getting Naked by Valerie Bertinelli comes out March 10 and is available for preorder now, wherever books are sold.
Read the full article here
