Parent Wants to Have a ‘Small’ Christmas with Fewer Gifts. Now, They ‘Feel Guilty’ It’s Not ‘Magical Enough’ for Their Kids

A parent is wondering if they should feel guilty for having a small Christmas for their children.

In a post on a “toddlers” subreddit, the original poster (OP) explained that they are the parent of a 4-year-old and a nearly 3-year-old. With the holidays approaching, OP shared that they are having an “internal struggle” where they have to remind themselves that they set the tone for Christmas, gift-receiving and what’s normal.

“It’s just hard not to compare our family to others. It feels like my kids are probably getting like a 1/3 as many gifts as their peers,” they wrote. “And honestly that’s for the better. But I still catch myself thinking we should do more.”

OP explained that their children only have grandparents on one side of the family and they get a couple of gifts from them.

“They don’t go over the top. They’re not the type. Just a couple $30-50 things,” they wrote. “They don’t get gifts from my spouse’s four siblings. They usually get a gift from one of my siblings. And a gift from my best friend.”

“Then they each get one thing from Santa. And maybe like three to four small things each from us,” OP added. “We have the money to go over the top, but I hate the crazy pressure of consumerism and over buying on Christmas.”

OP ended their post saying that they are “just looking for solidarity” from other people who may struggle with over buying and worried that a few gifts don’t make their kid’s holiday feel “magical enough.” Many users shared their thoughts under OP’s post.

“I’m also in the anti-over-consumption boat, but I’ll also add that small children have a much different perspective on what is ‘big.’ Once you hit say three to four gifts it all sort of becomes moot and they forget half the things they even received,” one user wrote. “You probably have an epic Christmas planned in their eyes.”

They added, “Santa is bringing my 4yo a box of Cinnamon toast crunch and let me tell you it’s going to be all he talks about all day.”

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Another user shared that what OP planned sounds “normal” to them.

“This sounds normal to me. I think toned down is better. Christmas doesn’t have to be about the gifts and by setting this as an expectation now, it will make it easier later,” they wrote. “My 3yo is getting 1 gift from santa, one from me, 1 from cousins/uncle/aunt and 1 from grandparents. I feel like it will get harder later and comparing gifts with friends but for now, what you are doing even sounds like alot.”

“So many new toys at once are overwhelming at this age anyways,” they wrote. “Make it magical in other ways – go to see lights, christmas music, decorate cookies!”