- After dividing cooking and cleaning duties for years, a man suggested to his wife they switch to a “you cook, you clean” system, he writes on Reddit
- The man contends he makes simpler meals and cleans as he goes, while his wife makes more elaborate dinners that create greater mess
- His wife is not on board with the change, resulting in a big argument
A man has gone viral after sharing that he’s instituted a rule in his household — “you cook, you clean” — and now it’s led to a “huge argument” with his wife.
In a post shared to Reddit, the anonymous man writes that he and his wife “switch off cooking, both of us cook twice a week and the days neither of us cook it’s a leftover night or takeout.”
While the couple used to divide up the tasks — one person cooked, the other person cleaned — the man writes that it didn’t feel fair.
“I clean as I cook, so when it is my night there are very few dishes for her to clean up,” he writes. “When she cooks, I swear she uses almost every single dish or pot for her meals. It is a disaster in the kitchen and takes me a long time to clean the whole thing up.”
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He continues: “I have had conversations before about this and have asked her to clean as she goes to reduce the mess. She refuses and claims that is just what happens because she likes to make elaborate meals. She does make more elaborate meals than me and spends a while in the kitchen. I prefer to make more simple meals like stir fry.”
Recently, he decided that he would no longer be cleaning up after his wife when she cooks, telling her “that I will clean up my dinners and she can clean up hers.”
But when it came time for her to cook, she didn’t clean up after herself.
“Sunday was her cooking night and she made homemade pasta and red pepper sauce. We ate and she didn’t clean up her mess, and later [in] the night she asked me to clean it up,” he writes. “I told her no and reminded her what I told her and pointed out I cleaned my stuff up.”
He continues: “This brings me to this morning, I didn’t do the dishes and when she woke up, there wasn’t much room for her to make her coffee and breakfast. She’s pissed I didn’t clean it up. We got in a huge argument before I left for work.”
Now, the man wants to know: who is in the wrong?
Commenters generally sided with the man, it turns out.
“It isn’t that her meals are more elaborate, it’s that she isn’t cleaning anything as she goes so it all piles up,” one wrote. “The division of labor isn’t anywhere near even. If she doesn’t want to clean as much, she can use less dishes or clean as she goes. She’s picking what meals she wants to cook, so she’s picking how much mess to make.”
Added another: “You brought up the change and kept to your word you cleaned up after your meal because you clean as you go. She now needs to do her dishes and clean the kitchen.”
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