When I came out as gay at the age of 14, I thought that would be the only time in my life I would come out of a “closet.” As it turned out, it prepared me for an even bigger coming out — as a medium. Hi, honey. My name is Travis, and I’m a medium. If you don’t believe in mediums, just consider me your gay uncle. Or friend. For the uninitiated, a medium is someone who connects with discarnate spirits, also known as “dead” people. These departed souls have so much to teach us if we are open and willing to listen.
My first coming out wasn’t received well by my family. I grew up in a conservative area of Ohio, and my family is Christian. So essentially, I was headed to hell in Dorothy’s handbasket. I’ve always been, let’s say, “sparkly,” so there really wasn’t much I could do to hide the fact that I was gay. The closet I was in may as well have been made of glass. Sharing the truth of my sexual orientation with my family was just the tip of the iceberg. You see, ever since I can remember, I have had a connection to the other side. I believe this is a connection we all possess for ourselves, but mediums are folks who just happen to be able to connect on others’ behalf too.
Naturally, if my being gay was a shock to my family, then talking to spirits would send them right over the edge. Can you imagine? Mom, dad … I’m seeing someone, and he’s right behind you. I hid the part of myself that could connect to unseen energy out of fear of being completely disowned. The pain of hiding this part of me paled in comparison to the fear of being fully seen. At that time in my life, I wasn’t even sure what to make of it. All I knew was that I could feel, hear and see things with my extra senses that most people couldn’t. Growing up, I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety, but those labels never felt right for me. Deep down, I knew something was waiting to be expressed and shared with the world. Turns out, I was right.
I wouldn’t come out as a medium until my early thirties. Newly sober from alcohol and searching for deeper meaning in my own life, the Universe gently guided me to meetings with psychics who would tell me that it was my purpose to help people connect to their departed loved ones and help others find healing. I had finally felt connected to my purpose, yet I felt like I was back in another closet. This one felt more like a broom closet: Stuffy, stale, and I was ready to share this ability with the world.
But I didn’t come out to close friends or family right away. Instead of sharing this new development with my closest friends and family, I took to social media and began giving live readings on TikTok. After a few months of giving readings, studying mediumship and spirit communication ferociously, and working with mentors who helped me trust my abilities, refine my evidence and learn how to hold the energy of Spirit with confidence, I decided it was time to “come out” again to my friends and family, this time as a medium. There were some raised eyebrows and quiet pauses at first, as if they were trying to wrap their heads around this new truth. But once I allowed myself to fully live, the anxiety and depression I suffered with began to dissipate. I felt like I could breathe. I felt alive.
We all have moments in life where we feel like we are “coming out.” Sharing truths about ourselves always holds the possibility of feeling rejection. The gift that has been given to me is the understanding that when we live in our truth, there is no true rejection; there is only redirection. When we allow ourselves to be fully seen and we open the proverbial closet door, we invite in light. We invite in love. You cannot feel rejection unless you have rejected yourself. Opening the door is the first step to living a life of alignment and purpose.
My question to the Universe for most of my life had been, “How can I live a life of meaning?” My name, Travis, means someone who stands at a bridge or a crossing. My last name, Holp, means “to have helped.” The answer to what I had been seeking was there all along, right in my own name. Maybe my mom had an understanding of who I was before I was even born.
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When we “come out” and we live in our truth, miracles happen. Our souls are here to live open and free. We are not designed to live suppressed and hidden away. To be given a gift and then to hide it is a disrespect to that gift. And the truth is, your body will tell you if you’re suppressing it. Like I experienced, suppression can manifest as depression, anxiety, physical illness and the list goes on. When we can live free, we become a light for others to also live free. It’s a ripple effect that can change not only ourselves, but the world. Every day we wake up, we get the choice of who we are showing up as. I’m not saying that it’s easy, but it is simple.
You deserve a life of authenticity and boundless freedom. After thousands of readings, connecting to souls from nearly every walk of life, I have learned that it is our Divine right to embrace this life. Everyone has the inherent right to live the life their soul came here to live. We did not come here to hide. We came here to express ourselves fully, authentically and that is our gift to the world. When we hide that gift, we hide the miracle that is us. Connecting with the departed has allowed me to see the beautiful gift that is life. If you are ready to live in more truth, perhaps this is your sign. I love you, and I’m incredibly proud of you.
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Are You There, Spirit? It’s Me, Travis: Life Lessons From the Other Side is available now, wherever books are sold.
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